Fo Waati Do

Mmang daalo kumbo nga mira na taala nña le la. I don’t cry because we are so familiar with one another, but I think about how our separation will be. ~Mandinka Proverb

Fo waati do (until next time)

There’s a glorious moment right when you first wake up in the morning where you do not remember a single thing about your life. It’s a tiny moment where you are at peace and in the comfort of rest. And then, just as quickly as the moment was there, it is gone. And the flood of emotion roils to the surface of our being and we are reminded of everything. This phenomenon happened to me this morning. I woke up and forgot the sadness of yesterday for that tiny space of time. And then, a fresh wave of grief rolled over me.

Yesterday was the day my family and I were dreading for months, weeks, and finally, days. The day I would move out of village and on with the next chapter in my life story. I refused to say goodbye, but only, “see you later.” I just cannot bear to think I will never see some of those faces again. If someone had told me two years ago when I was dropped off and terrified, how hard it would be to get in the vehicle to go home I would have laughed and said, “Yeah, alright, very funny.” And then the PC vehicle rolled up and I slowly started putting my bags in the car. I frantically searched for my mother but she was nowhere to be seen. Both my brothers ran out of the compound early in the morning as well.

My first “See you laters” were to Binta and Kaddy. As I turned to face Binta (my sister-in-law and best friend in village) the tears rolled down my cheeks. I hugged her as tightly as my arms would allow and she let out a great sob and ran into her house to hide her tears from me. I turned to look down at Kaddy who was sitting on the bench in front of our house and she was already crying. I gave her a hug and told her there was already one river Gambia, and not to make another with her tears. I got in the car and waved goodbye to my little Adama (Baby Blue) who had no idea where I was going or what was happening. I proceeded to the center of my village where I found my brother, Sambou. I asked him why he left. He was honest with me and explained he just thought it would be easier that way. I told him I could never leave without a last moment with him. We hugged and cried in one another’s arms and he wiped the tears away from my face. Yusupha, my other brother made no appearance and sadly I did not get to see him. The final person I saw was my mother, Nanding Fatou. In all my time here I never saw her cry, not once. Not when family members died, or when she was sick, or tired, never. She took one look at me and the tears started to flow. I hugged her so many times I thought she would never let me go. The grief in our bodies just passed through each other as we said our final words. She prayed for me, and as hard as it was to tear away, we finally had to let one another go. Abaraka Bake (Thank You) was such a gross understatement for the amount of gratitude I felt for these people, but it was all I could muster. I cried the entire way to the capital (two hours away), every time I thought I was done, my mind would reflect on something and the tears would flow again.

I used to think it would be easier to be guarded with people, to not wear my heart on my sleeve, to avoid the type of pain that comes with losing someone, or saying farewell. Now, I realize what a joyful life I get to live because of these people and feelings. Winnie the Pooh had it right, “How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.” I cried at every little things in the week leading up to my pick-up. When I saw my women dancing and drumming, when I held my little Adama and told her I loved her, when I looked at my family all sitting together around the food bowl, when I looked up at the night sky and felt I could see every single star. I just kept thinking to myself, I will never have this again, except what has seeped into my soul. I had to say goodbye to a life, to a people, to a language. As I write now, tears again roll down my cheeks, and those tears oddly make me happy because I know if I left any other way, my service was not what it was meant to be. I have dreams of coming back and returning to The Gambia but like so many things in life, it will never be the same.

This experience changed me, I thought perhaps it would, but I underestimated just how much. I owe so much gratitude to the people who took me in as a part of their family here in The Gambia and to my American friends and family for supporting me on this journey. Thank you!

I set out to change the world, man oh man were my eyes opened. I may not have accomplished changing the world, but a small piece of the world changed me. 

Camp GLOW 2016

     How does one describe an event that took one whole year to plan and is now completed and over? Well…from the beginning of course. Camp GLOW (Girls and Guys Leading Our World) 2016 has been one of the highlights of my service. Camp had a theme this year, Footsteps Toward Our Future. Camp was a chance for six teachers and 24 grade ten students, two boys and two girls from six schools to come together for a week and create something magical.

            Misi and I ran around the week before camp like chickens with our heads cut off. We were trying to finalize last minute details, shop for everything, make sure counterparts were booked, just the two of us against the world…okay not the world but against The Gambia throwing us curve balls for sure. The week before Camp GLOW, my mid-service training was scheduled as well as a staff retreat which made planning and organizing a bit more challenging than we had both expected. Luckily, we had the help of our fairy godfather’s Samanka and Haruna. They helped us buy everything we needed as well as loaded it all on to the vehicle the day we left Kombo for Massembeh.

            Misi and I were exaughsted and camp had not even begun yet. Then, the Gambia got us again! Our PCV staff were supposed to be arriving on Saturday which was announced to be setsetal (a day where everything is closed until 1pm for country wide cleaning, no cars are allowed on the road). Miraculously, everyone got to Massembeh on Saturday after a rough travel day. Sunday we started decorating and preparing for the campers arrival. As schools started showing up Misi and I got them checked in and welcomed them to camp. We then sent them on a Passport scavenger hunt to get familiar with the camp grounds. There was a station for piñatas, one with basketball, one with identifying American snacks, one with dance, and one for yoga, they loved it. We held a Campfire the first night we sang and laughed through some hilarious dance moves. We also taught the kids the Camp GLOW cheer that Teila created for camp:

            Aasalaamelekuum, yes we say peace unto you

            Take a bow, shake a hand, greet the day, woo woo

            We are guys and girls taking steps to lead the world

            And the change will start today, atcha, let’s go, Camp GLOW!

            Day 2 we woke the kids up with a pre-test on gender equality, community involvement, and healthy home life. We started round robins on this day where each school got to go to a station. We had tie and dye, mural painting, yoga, dancing, media, and beading. The campers were having so much fun with each and they were so excited that they would all get to do one station each day. On one of the card questionnaires we asked them where their favorite place to be was and they all said Massembeh. For sports we played basketball and did a glow stick hunt in the dark.

            Day 3 we had a gender swap relay race where campers had to perform activities that are usually accepted as one gender’s task over another. They had to plow the fields, pound coos, count back change, run with water buckets on their heads, and carry babies on their backs. We held our first gender talk around the campfire. This experience is where girls and guys split up and discuss difficult topics they could not normally discuss in their own homes. We spoke about marrying too young, sugar daddies, sexual harassment, mental health, and suicide. These tenth grade girls have been through so much already and still realize the value of education and want to make the best of themselves. As difficult as these conversations were to sit in on, they were inspiring as well.

            Day 4 was a day full of activity. We had two round robins today and two sports. We played capture the flag water war style with three teams: green, pink, and yellow. I was on the green team, sadly we did not win, but yellow came out of nowhere with a victory to be spoken of for generations. We played ultimate Frisbee after and the campers loved it so much. You may be wondering when the kids had time for learning. Rest assured they were busy from dawn until way past dusk with lessons and fun. We taught them about s’mores around the campfire and they absolutely loved them.

            Day 5 we made the campers pancakes and they were a huge hit. We wanted them to experience some American foods as well as their traditional Gambian cuisine. This day was volleyball day for sports. In the evening we watched Mulan and talked about what they saw in the film. They really enjoyed the movie and understood a ton of key concepts and ideas. This is the day that I realized the campers were really starting to feel empowered and find their own personal voices. I sat on the steps and watched as they played sports and felt the glow of pride wash over me for each and every one of them. I saw them walk into camp not sure about how to be or how to behave and sitting on the step seeing them laughing and talking about their ideas and dreams made me tear up. Not at what Misi and I had done, but at how truly wonderful the students were.

            Day 6 there was another gender talk where we discussed assault, sexual violence, hardships, and overcoming financial barriers. We discussed things Americans cannot even imagine. We are so privileged in the life we live and we do not even realize it until 12 young, beautiful, strong, independent, tenth graders come together to share their testimonies. I went to bed feeling grateful, sad about these young women’s struggles, and determined to keep encouraging the youth of this country and every country I work in to follow their hearts, dreams, and to live the lives they have imagined.

            Day 7 came too quickly for everyone. We gave the campers their post test and they improved significantly on every single section of the test since the beginning of the week. We held our closing ceremonies and Peace Corps The Gambia’s Country Director Jennifer, Programming Manager Greg, US Embassy Ambassador Patricia Alsup all were in attendance. The event was lovely we awarded the campers for participation, gave out certificates of appreciation, and had traditional dancers perform for us. There were 3 konkorans (see Konkoran Kookiness for definition), and Ziimba’s (a traditional warrior dance in hunting for a lion). Misi and I were so proud of the kids and teachers for all they accomplished during the week.

            Day 8 was a morning full of tears as PCV staff said goodbye to campers and saddest yet, as campers said their goodbyes to one another. We all sang the cheer one last time. We walked them to the gate and all threw our hands up into a tunnel for the kids to walk through as we sang our goodbye song. We cleaned up Massembeh and debriefed the event. Overall, a huge success. Now what?

            The work does not end here Misi and I came back to Kombo to unload everything and write thank you’s. We also have to close the grant out after a post trek to the schools. I am so proud of the work we put into this event and the results of it, not only were the campers’ lives changed, so were ours.

            Our goals were to encourage participants to analyze the benefits and consequences of gender roles, gender issues, and gender empowerment in their culture. Educate the participants on reproductive and sexual health, HIV/AIDS, STI’s, healthy relationships, and family planning. Use life skills sessions to focus on communication skills, public speaking, and decision making to build self-confidence in participants.  Teach participants how to effectively disseminate Camp GLOW topics such as gender equality, healthy lifestyle choices, and team work in their home communities. Enhance teachers' knowledge of how to implement gender equitable practices within the classroom, student-centered teaching, and creating extra-curricular programs which will encourage students to get involved in their community. Motivate the participants to use their positive behaviors and decision making skills to be role models in their communities and schools. Promote positive healthy relationships between males and females based on respect and equality. Encourage the participants to share knowledge gained in their home communities and schools by establishing or working with existing peer clubs at their schools. Establish partnerships with local organizations/government offices. We did it and so much more!

Thank you to every single person who made this possible, the list would take up six pages but truly and deeply from the bottom of my heart thank you!

Misi,

35 forever

Love, Coleen